This could be another episode in a soap opera if it were not so ordinary and maybe even boring? I took the bike back to the pawn shop. The husband and I didn’t even have to discuss it. He reads my blog, in fact it may have become our major point of communication. He announced that I could have the truck, early in the morning before I left for my trip so I could return the gearless wonder.

In spite of the fact that on the bottom of the receipt was “All Sales Final, No Returns, No Exchanges” I approached the matter with a positive attitude. My tactic was to admit that my priorities were somewhat foolish and that after riding the bike for two days I had come to the conclusion that I just didn’t feel safe on it. And I wasn’t asking for a return or an exchange. I was asking for an upgrade which is different, and to their advantage.  I got a different salesperson this time and I think he was the owner.  He did not say a single frightening thing. In fact the very first thing he said was that he didn’t want me feeling unsafe and he was sure he could work something out. He was a bit more helpful and understood completely about me wanting a cable attached to the gear shift. And after I took his recommendation, test rode his Avalon Next 7000 series and liked it, he gave it to me even trade even though it was priced $10 higher than the return.

I looked up reviews on this bike – they sell, or used to sell it at WalMart.  The used ones were going for around $100 and this one was a little over half that amount. I think I got a good deal. It’s also mostly aluminum so it’s clean and shiny, no rust.  It is a bit of an “old lady” bike but at least it’s not a three wheeler, and I am almost an old lady.  Just sayin’.

Sad.
sad and busy
sit together because they help each other

busy
makes the coffee,
opens the car doors, loads suitcases while sad wonders

sad
wonders when to touch, to hug,
to take a picture and freeze a precious moment to savor, later.

Time,
says busy,, where did it go?
Did I make it be so mysteriously gone?

Time
does not say when, but I
know each goodbye is practice for a greater goodbye

Sad
remembers each hello
is practice too, for a greater greeting outside of time.

They do need each other, these two.

I’m not really sure if tikki is spelled with two k’s – doesn’t matter either. A place with a grass roof and open sides, usually on the beach. We just had a walk along the river in Bradenton which ended at a place such as this and since we were hot and thirsty we sat down in a shady place with a nice breeze and cooled our heels. It was lovely. I will probably remember it for a long time.

It’s a strange feeling to be spending what you believe to be your last few days in a place you count as familiar – knowing you may never have a reason to return again. It’s even harder when you know you like the place.  This is what I am experiencing even though it’s not been me who has been living in this little ranchette in Gainesville, it’s been my daughter.  I’m remembering all the times I’ve visited, all the celebrations we’ve had here, all the work I’ve done at various times, the trail rides I’ve been on in the neighborhood, the exploratory drives I’ve taken through the little towns nearby, the stores and restaurants I’ve visited, the many nights on the couch, catching up on Julie’s tivo shows, chasing the horses away from the shrubs they love to eat, fighting ants, planting gardens, scrubbing horse troughs. I could go on even longer than this but you get the idea.

Gainesville has served it’s purpose. In the last four years it has turned out another class of veterinarians who are being unleashed on the world – Julie among them. We could have had a more temporal viewpoint if it had been more school-like and institutional, if she had lived in a dormitory and had no life outside of classes.  But she has had her first real home of her own making, and for four years has poured a great deal of effort into it. She has been carpenter, plumber, mechanic, tenant and landlord, and developed a fairly large network of friends and business contacts. I’m just saying it’s difficult to be in the leaving stage when you don’t have much knowledge about the next stage you’re entering. 

But that’s going to be pretty exciting and I am going to do all I can to help her think about what’s ahead.  Anticipation is a fun stage too.  And tomorrow we celebrate the success of the last four years with a graduation ceremony and a small gathering of friends. All our landmarks occassions are paired with great feasts of food (why is that? I don’t know.) and true to form we have been shopping and preparing food much of the time today.  Julie and the father are at an awards banquet tonight (what did I tell you – more food).  The grandparents are braving all the inconveniences of being away from home and having irregular schedules and are a great help to me as I try to help my daughter. We get to build some memories around these last few days here and I guess that’s what life is all about, doing things you want to remember. Just sayin’… 

I have northern visitors, FINALLY!  It’s been about nine months since I saw the parents and now they are safely here.  They had a few hours to “people watch” in the Minneapolis airport, followed by a smooth non-stop flight. I met them as they came from their gate and we were home to Bradenton in no time at all, even with rush hour traffic.  We’ve had supper and are all tired now from our early starts. (I worked this morning, up at 5am). We are at the beginning of an eventful week and although I know it will go quickly I am determined to be “in the moment” for as much of it as possible.


I made Mom get in a picture with me



It doesn’t make a lot of sense. I’m not the only one who does this either.  There’s something about having company come, overnight guests, that makes people think of having to be perfectly prepared. Of course, most visitors would expect a clean bed, and maybe a neat bedroom.  But what about the inside of the microwave, the dust on the top of the bookcase, a dead house plant here and there, maybe a few cat hairs on the recliner?

And even more ridiculous, it’s my parents who are coming. They don’t know what I’m like? I lived with them for 18 years and really haven’t changed a whole lot as far as my cleanliness standards go. I’ve decided to treat it kind of like a spot on my favorite shirt – instead of not wearing it and throwing it in the laundry I pretend it just happened since putting it on, and what can I do? After the parents are here for a couple hours they won’t know whether the dirt was here before they came or if it appeared since and belongs to them. It will be evening and I can keep the lights low. I’ll put flowers in their bedroom to distract them. 

And ultimately, would they want me to obsess about housework and make myself miserable? No they would not! They want pure happiness and me, in good health and rested, so I can enjoy their visit. None of this wearing myself out with floor scrubbing. Instead I am eating popcorn and writing in my blog.

There won’t be much time tomorrow after they get here so we’ll have supper and get them to bed as early as needed – travel days are a little stressful.  Tuesday will be the day for my dad to visit with his sister and her husband before they head back north for the summer.  They will be here for breakfast and supper – a fun day of eating and relaxing.  Wednesday we’ll be gathering things together for a graduation celebration on Saturday.  In the afternoon we’ll go boating on the intercoastal waterway and have a picnic supper – a fun evening of eating and relaxing. Thursday, we’ll travel to Gainesville where the graduation will take place.  Probably more eating and relaxing.  Friday night there will be an award banquet that the husband and daughter Julie are attending – yes, more eating and relaxing.  And Saturday after the grad ceremony we’ll all gather at Julie’s house and eat and relax with her friends.  Are you getting the subliminal theme of the week (eat and relax, eat and relax…) So you see, I haven’t been scrubbing floors but look at all the stuff I’ve been planning! I’m awesome! 



Ok, so I did clean inside the microwave (looks nice huh?). But I didn’t scrub the floor.



Isn’t that an interesting word?  Limbic. It comes from limbus which mean a border or edge and it’s used in medical terminology. I’ve been reading about it lately as it relates to an important part of the human brain which is kind of on the edge of/between two other important parts of the brain (I don’t know if there is an unimportant part of the brain – probably not.) Some scientists say the limbic system is an outdated term since the things it includes and the functions it performs keeps changing.

This is one of the interesting things about this part of the brain, whatever you want to call it. It is the link between thoughts and physical reactions.  It is why thinking you are allergic to something is pretty much the same as actually being allergic to something.  It is why emotions such as fear can flood your body with hormones that trigger energy release, put some of your body systems in high gear and shut others down completely. 

I have often felt compassion for people with multiple allergies that are limiting their lives significantly. Do you know there are people that have to isolate themselves from just about everything including regular atmospheric air, most foods and even other people? It’s called Multiple Chemical Sensitivities/Environmental Illness (MCS/EI). There are other conditions that have a connection with MCS/EI and can come along with it – fibromyalgia for one, depressive disorders, panic attacks, asthma, thyroid disorders, immune disorders. 

What you think can affect every function of every system in your body.  It is a fascinating area of study.  And because it concerns thoughts, emotions and the spirit, science is not the only authority speaking to it. There is more to “as he thinketh in his heart, so is he”  (Prov. 23:7) than meets the eye. It’s why laughing is good for you.  It’s why happily married couples live longer on average, and it’s why being confident and secure feels better than being fearful and resentful.