Our second full day in Boulder City was spent seeing Hoover Dam, Lake Mead and Willow Beach, all part of the Lake Mead National Recreation Area. Nothing I had heard about the dam did justice to what I saw. What an immense, engineering project that must have been back then. Even now, it is somewhat mind boggling. This dam on the Colorado River supplies electricity to major cities like Las Vegas, Phoenix, Los Angeles, and San Diego.
Top of the dam from the river sideIt’s a very long way down, lots of wiresPart of Lake Mead, the marina, most of those islands used to be submerged.
We drove through the security checkpoint along with many other vehicles, then along the top of the dam to a parking lot on the other side of the river. Parking was free in some lots but there were covered lots for a fee. We walked back along the top of the dam. We saw the large stacks with the turbines inside on the Lake Mead side. The power lines and the generators were below the dam on the river side. Lake Mead water levels have been low for a few years – water is precious and there has been less of it because of drought.
Of course, there are Visitor Centers with good information and souvenirs.
My friend at the visitor center. I am such a tourist!
Boulder City housed the workers who built the dam. There are many places around the city with great views of the lake and the marina. We left the dam and traveled south on Highway 93 on a magnificent bridge. Several miles downstream we visited Willow Beach on the Colorado River. One of Kevin’s favorite places there was the brown trout fish hatchery. There were trout in all stages of growth. There were kayaks, paddleboards and pontoon boats for rent at the Beach Center as well as souvenirs of all kinds.
Highway 93 bridge across the Colorado RiverFish HatcheryThousands of young troutI’m in the water (a bit).
The common view of the Colorado is at the bottom of a canyon with cliffs on either side. Willow Beach is one of the rare places where you can get to the water, and I did. It was a fun place to visit.
We were at a birthday party last night, our first night in Nevada, and heard about the bloom. Some of Kevin’s friends were taking a trip the next day to Death Valley to see flowers, of all things! It’s true, when the desert blooms, you had better go see it. This year’s bloom is being called a superbloom, the best of the decade. Kevin’s brother and sister-in-law are still with us, so we decided to be tourists and head to Death Valley today.
Death Valley is about 2 ½ hours from Boulder City. I am glad to finally be visiting some national parks and getting some value from my Senior Pass. I was surprised to learn that the Death Valley National Recreation Area is the largest national park in the U.S. There was a nice Visitor’s Center with a great historical gallery. I got lost in the displays there and kept the others waiting and wondering where I was. I got a T-shirt and a hiking medallion. I was a good tourist.
The only “hiking” we did (but don’t tell anyone) was to walk around the remains of the borax processing area. In the 1800’s a businessman tried to refine borax from the floor of the lake. The business didn’t last long. Death Valley was a hard place to work. But we still have 20 Mule Team Borax on the shelf in stores and that’s where it started.
It took 20 mules to pull these loaded wagons.Kevin is a tall man – gives you an idea of the size of these wagons!
We started looking for flowers right away but there was a lot of dessert that wasn’t blooming yet. We might have found more blooms if we had gotten out and hiked off road, but that wasn’t the plan. Several times we got out of the truck and took pictures of every flower we could find. One called Desert Gold is the most prevalent right now.
Desert GoldDesert Five Spot (five red spots inside)Heliotrope phaceliaLarge drifts of flowers in some places.
We traveled out of Death Valley and had a late lunch in Parumph. The Dry Creek Saloon gave us a bit of local color and taste. Our chef was very attentive to our requests and I considered him worthy of a photo. So were his smashburgers. Back in Boulder City we took a walk along the main street and stopped in at Mr. T’s for refreshing drinks. I’m enjoying everything southwest.
Dry Creek Saloon in ParumphSmashburgers with potato and macaroni salads.
The first night after arriving in Boulder City the weather news was all about the full moon for the month. A special lunar eclipse was due to occur in the early morning, around 3 am. It didn’t have a very attractive name, Worm Blood Moon. I understood the blood part, because in the earth’s shadow, the moon always looks red. The Worm part doesn’t make as much sense to me and doesn’t sound pretty either. I didn’t plan on seeing it. I’m used to disappointment when there are clouds or trees in the way. To me, it’s not worth interrupting a much needed night’s sleep.
August 2026 full moon over Round Lake
One time last summer, Kevin and I went out to Round Lake to look at a beautiful full moon. It was a clear night and we both admired the way the moonlight made a path across the water. We talked about how many songs we remembered that had a moon in them. (How many can you think of?) We were both pretty high on the romance scale and decided to get together every full moon. We had looked forward to this March full moon knowing we would be together on our trip. We gave it a good looking over before we retired for the night.
I don’t know why I woke up at 3:15 am. I didn’t know where in the sky the moon would be. I don’t know why I lifted the shade to look out the window. But it was there, in the perfect spot for me to view it. The sky was clear and the moon was about 45 degrees off the horizon, red and round. I’m shy about waking other people up at night so I watched it alone. My lounge chair was like having a front row seat for 45 minutes. It was changing very slowly so I decided not to wait until it was completely over. I went back to sleep.
My first lookA different setting, still in shadowEclipse about half overMoon was lower now, behind a tree branch
It was a unique way to start out the time in Nevada. I had never photographed a lunar eclipse before.
Several months ago I was invited to vacation in Boulder City, Nevada. Kevin’s daughter and family live there and he visits them each spring. He has three young grandsons who he loves to visit. He drives there because he stays for a month or more and needs his transportation. It’s a long trip. I decided to go with him and we began to plan.
We stayed at my brother’s house in LaCrosse the first night. We started being tourists right away and got a great tour of the city on the Mississippi. The geography there is interesting and the history is too. We visited the Dahl Ford museum which was right up Kevin’s line. He has worked for Ford dealerships for a long time. The hospitality at the Smith house was excellent and chef Jean Claude fed us so well.
Brother Bob at the Dahl Ford museum.
Sister-in-law Elizabeth at the park on the bluff overlooking LaCrosse valley.
Mississippi River in the background. Kevin and I in the left corner.
Our next stop was Frederick, Colorado where we stayed with Kevin’s friends Dean and Jean Elliott. (Elliott with two l’s and two t’s – the right way). While there we had a great dinner at The Roost in Longmont. The next day they went with us to Estes Park. Rocky Mountain National Park is there. My camera is FULL of mountain scenes that will remind me of how breathtaking it was. We had a short hike to a waterfall and I learned about alluvial fans. Now I see them everywhere in this mountainous country.
Rocky Mountain National Park near Estes Park, CO from a very high place on the road.
Lots of this on Saturday, February 28, 2026
Our next stop was Parowan, a beautiful desert town in a valley. That day’s drive through parts of Zion National Park was spectacular. The Virgin River Gorge was… a real gorge! There is a 15 mile stretch of I-15 that winds through it. It was the most expensive stretch of highway at the time it was made in 1973. Photos were taken but they never do justice to the 400 foot limestone cliffs on either side. Wow. Wow.
Early morning departure from Parowan, UT
Starting through the Virgin River Gorge
We reached our destination, Boulder City, Nevada on Sunday, March 1st. We are definitely in the desert. This time of year there are more places that have had water recently. There are flowers and green grass to see. Kevin and I both are gardeners so we spend time identifying the plants and trees we see around us. It’s a different world from the northwoods of Wisconsin.
So fun! Got to watch a hot air balloon over St. George, Utah.
February 21, 2026. Tomorrow afternoon, I will go to the volunteer appreciation lunch for the Birkie ski race. It was a year ago at the same event that I met Kevin May for the very first time.
The Birkie volunteer hat for 2025.
I was sitting at a table on the edge of the banquet area, in a large, noisy room. The table was not in a great place for seeing the speaker, so it wasn’t full. I had chosen it because it was close to the door. Two of my friends from my hiking club had joined me. It was almost time for the serving to start when Kevin came in, looking for a seat. He asked if we were saving chairs for anyone. We weren’t, so he sat and we started talking. It was difficult to hear each other, so he moved to the chair next to mine.
I had recently gotten on the board of my favorite non-profit. The board was woefully short of members, especially men. I had been praying that God would send some recruits my way. My goal was to ask every male I encountered who might possibly be interested. I figured that maybe this was the guy I should scout out. Fortunately, Kevin is a car salesman and knows how to make conversation with strangers. We talked during the meal almost non-stop. My friends noticed that and remarked to me later.
I don’t give my number to random men, ever, but there’s always a first time. I offered to give him a tour of the non-profit and handed him my card. He was going to leave Hayward for a month but said he would call when he got back in town. At least I had been brave and done my part. If God had sent him, He would handle the follow through as well. I hate crowds and got out the door quickly when the program was over. I don’t remember saying goodbye.
A couple of days later, to my surprise, Kevin sent a text. He was in Flagstaff, on his way to his daughter’s house. A couple more days and he texted again, this time from Lake Mead. Spread out over the next week were two more texts, and then a phone call. It was beginning to feel like I was being pursued and that was… well, kind of fun. We hadn’t been face to face that afternoon at the table so I couldn’t remember exactly what he looked like. Naturally I hunted on the internet and found him on LinkedIn. The picture there wasn’t very helpful. We talked a lot over the next couple of weeks. I liked his voice and the attention was addictive.
Did he look like this? I couldn’t remember.
He came back to Hayward at the end of March, and we decided to meet for a walk. He took me to the local cafe afterward for dinner.
I had lost my husband to Lewy Body dementia the summer of 2023. I had a pretty comfortable life, as a widow and companion for my elderly mom. I hadn’t dated. I hadn’t even thought about dating. I was busy and I had friends. My journal entry for the day of our walk was short and to the point. “Nice man and easy to be with but not my type. There will be no romance.”
I didn’t realize then that this is the way a romance often starts. To be continued.
Today I decided to quit trying the same thing (and getting the same disappointing results). I’m referring to the book publishing process, of course. Instead of trying to communicate in the way I had been told to, I went public instead. It worked.
The online tool used by my publisher is called ClickUp. I’ve never quite understood it, but I always assumed I was the problem. My messages to them were piling up without anyone answering. Today I went to the publisher’s author Facebook page with a public SOS message. I was rewarded fairly quickly by a fellow writer who gave me a new name to contact. I also tagged the owner of the publishing company and he responded too. I am now back in the game with the next assignment. They have assigned the book to be formatted, a process that takes around two weeks.
I received this correspondence, and finally, we are getting somewhere.
If only I had known to do this sooner. Maybe I’m too patient, or confused, or lazy. Maybe the timing isn’t in my hands. Yeah, I like that last one. So, here we go again. Please keep this process in your prayers.
Meanwhile, back in small town Hayward, Wisconsin, we are hosting 11,000 cross country skiers. I’m helping to feed them when they finish their 50k race, cold and exhausted. No dull moments this weekend as the American Birkebeiner (Birkie) unfolds.
And no dull moments next week either. ROAD TRIP!!! I’m gearing up for 35 days of travel and can hardly wait to start writing about them. Stay tuned.
My man, my book, my family – three main issues keeping life interesting.
There aren’t a lot of separate compartments in my life anymore. Almost everything is connected to every other thing. Today, I’m thinking about the book that I’ve been working on seemingly forever.
When I started spending time with Kevin one of the first things we talked about was our death experiences. His was the death of his ex wife and his role as caregiver for her. Mine was the death of my husband, Dennis, and my role as caregiver for him. I told him that I had written about my experience and that I was getting a book published about it. I guess he was impressed. He started planning to take me on a book signing tour when the book came out. He’s still waiting.
So having told a little about Kevin, I must now tell something about the book. Since I knew nothing about publishing, I paid a publisher to help me through the steps. Three or four times I have been excited and told family and friends that great progress has been made. The rough draft of the book was written and a cover was designed. Beta readers gave feedback. Editors helped with development and cleaning up the copy. All this to say that progress has been made, but so agonizingly slow.
I understand that I am not the publisher’s ideal client. I haven’t wanted to blast social media with the marketing of my book. I haven’t wanted to hunt down people to endorse my book. I have gone on zero podcasts to talk about my book. I’m not planning on book signing tours (sorry Kevin). I only want a written record of what happened for posterity. It would be nice to sell a few copies but that has not been my main goal.
Now, it’s been over a year since buying my publishing package. I have no idea if anything is happening with the final stages toward a finished book. I’m getting worried about the lack of response. I’ve never had a hard copy of my manuscript, but to be safe I had one printed. I gave it to Kevin. He read it. I hoped he would understand me better, through my story, and I think that happened. Once again, major issues in my life get connected, one to another. Funny, right?
Bu this whole “book thing” needs to be done soon. I can’t keep editing, rewriting, and reliving it in detail over and over again. Initially I felt that God wanted me to record what my husband and I were going through. I still think that, and if it is true, I will at some point have a book. But I’m done telling anyone to hold their breath waiting for it.
Cover of the Someday Book, except with a change to the subtitle.
My Kevin doesn’t “fly off the handle”, and that’s a good thing to know. After our uncomfortable evening driving home in separate cars, he texted me good night as usual. He asked me over for Sunday dinner, which is also a routine we have. But I knew he was thinking things over.
On Sunday, we had a serious conversation in which he told me he did not feel “equal” to me. When it came to spirituality and faith, he said he probably wouldn’t ever be. I must have mentioned being “unequally yoked” as being one of my concerns at some time. He was getting the point that my faith was the highest priority in my life. He wanted to be honest about how intimidating that felt to him.
I went home in a very somber mood. I decided I couldn’t keep seeing him. I wrote him a letter of explanation, in case I had trouble telling him in person. I asked him to come over the next day. I could tell that he anticipated what I was going to say.
At this point in our relationship we had been dating for nine months. I had so many reasons to love this guy! We had hiked all spring and summer, and helped each other with projects. We had shared dozens of meals, and talked for countless hours. We were going to make Thanksgiving dinner together for our families. We had future plans. We had verbally acknowledged that we liked each other a lot. It was incredibly difficult to give all this up and I cried as I told him my decision. He listened quietly, even patted my hand and told me he knew it was hard. I thought he had come to the same conclusion all by himself. We said goodbye, and he left.
It turns out that we weren’t very good at breaking up. I became aware of how much I missed him almost from the start. I knew how happy I had been lately, and how sad I was going to be. It was a relief when we started finding small ways to check on each other. I began to hope we would still be friends. It took us a little over a week. By Thanksgiving evening, while talking on the phone, we agreed that what we had done wasn’t working at all. We were done with the misery, because we could be. It wasn’t a hard decision.
Are we “unequally yoked” in our faith? Even more than me, Kevin has always thought that it was more than chance that we met. He does have faith that God can plan relationships between people for their good. We have talked about how God has shown up for us at different times in our lives. My upbringing has blessed me with more biblical literacy than his, but that is not what faith is about. There were a lot of biblical literate people around in Jesus’ day too. Jesus preferred fishermen who had faith in Him.
In our case, I believe Kevin and I have differences. But it would be foolish to think that God is done with either one of us. I hadn’t asked God for another love relationship and hadn’t expected one. I know I could go without one if that’s what God wanted for me. So, Kevin coming along has been a real surprise to me, at times a little scary. I’ve prayed about it from the start. I also feel a somewhat miraculous plan behind what we have. God started something, and unless He stops it, I’m in it. I believe that God is actively planning my future, and Kevin’s part in it. I know it’s going to be interesting to see what He does with our differences.
There will be more about my man, Kevin. I have so many stories…
Here I am again, and it’s only been four months since I last wrote. I think about doing it a lot but I have the habit of doing other things instead. In the business of recording my life, I’m uncomfortable with these large gaps. Winter of 2026 is a good time to catch up. Being home recovering from Norovirus gives me more than the usual time to do it.
It seems that my life, lately, has centered around three main issues; my man, my book, my family. I will start with my man, Kevin. I had heard that you can learn a lot about a person by traveling with them. That is why I had invited Kevin to join me in North Carolina. I have to say that this trip did not disappoint.
On our hike in Clifty State Park, Madison IN, with the Ohio river in the background.
We did well while staying with Julie. We did well traveling in the car to Indiana. Everyone has their own style of travel and we matched pretty well. I was excited to show Kevin my cousin’s beautiful hotel on the Ohio river (Fairfield Inn, Madison IN). I had booked a room there for him, while I stayed at Marlene’s house. We spent an extra day there and took an eventful hike at Clifty State Park. I could write a whole story on that hike, but not now.
The last day of the trip was to the Wisconsin airport where he had left his truck. Toward the end of this time, we talked about our relationship. One or the other of us will often put the invitation out there – “what are you thinking?” It’s one of the things I admire about Kevin. He actually has reflected on our relationship and will talk about what he thinks.
I had some questions about intimacy, partly because doing a trip together has a definite feeling of intimacy. Even aside from sexuality, there’s all that time in the car, learning each other’s tolerance for bathroom stops and hunger needs, what to listen to on the radio… it’s a lot. But we hadn’t really talked about the sexual aspects. We hadn’t shared a room, or a bed and I had sensed there was tension surrounding that.
Kevin and I come from somewhat different cultures. The bottom line in my upbringing is no sex outside of the marriage covenant. In his, marriage is important, but not as necessary if there is commitment expressed. I think what I asked him was, “Are you just waiting, and expecting that I will soon change my beliefs about marriage and sleep with you?” He thought for a moment and answered “yes”.
Looking back, I think he heard the “are you waiting” part, and of course he was waiting. I was concerned about the “are you waiting for me to change” part, and that was not going to happen. I also added that if a sexual relationship was his primary goal, he should probably go find someone else to pursue it with, asap. My hurt was that he apparently did not respect my faith held views on a Godly marriage. His hurt was that I would so easily reject him.
And so began our first real crisis. It didn’t feel like an argument, really. It felt more like an ultimatum.There was no shouting or other meanness, but things did get really quiet. Fortunately we were at the airport. We finished the last hour of our trip in separate cars trying to process what had just happened. It was only the beginning of what we would learn.
For the next few posts I will be writing about two people with the same first name, Kevin. To avoid confusion I will refer to my Kevin (Kevin May) and the other Kevin (Kevin Shanahan or Julia’s Kevin). I may occasionally call them Kevin M and Kevin S.
Yesterday I made the trip to Raleigh/Durham airport to pick up my Kevin and fetch him back to the farm. He met the Shanahans last August when they visited Hayward, but their time with him was brief. I reintroduced him to the family and gave him a walking tour of the house, barns, property and our Haw River trails. It was gorgeous weather. We hadn’t been together for a while, except on the phone, so there was catching up to do.
I have been helping Julia with the evening meals while here, so I enlisted my Kevin’s help in the kitchen. I think the hardest thing about mealtime is deciding what to make. Kevin has an idea for almost any kind of meat, so I was glad to hear what he would do with the several pounds of chicken breast in the fridge. We had a pretty decent dinner ready when Julie got home from work. Kevin S, his daughter Reagan and son Camden (aka Bubba), Gwennie, Julia, Keven M and I all sat down around the dining table and had dinner at the same time. I only mention this because it doesn’t happen a lot for various reasons. It was nice.
My Kevin has been making inroads with Gwennie, big time. For some reason, unknown to any of us, she has decided to call him Mr. Jim. It’s okay—I had been wondering what she should call him. I really didn’t want her to think all grown men were called Kevins. He made the astute move of calling up “Itsy Bitsy Spider” on his phone. That was followed by “No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed” and “Twinkle, Twinkle”. Her fascination with screens is very evident and her memory is great. She now asks Mr. Jim to play songs on his phone every time she sees him.
My daughter Julia has always been great at making lists of stuff she wants done. Last Tuesday, on her day off, we rode around the farm in the mule. We made lists of everything that needed to be done. She says we need lists so that we’ll know what to do when we have a spare minute. After seeing the list I was pretty sure there wouldn’t be any spare minutes, ever. It’s a farm. Farms are where things go to break, deteriorate and sometimes die. Except for brush, weeds and thorns which seem to thrive remarkably well.
My Kevin doesn’t like to be a freeloader. Today we looked at the list and chose a job to do which we didn’t think would be too difficult. I take that back. I have no idea why we chose that job. We decided to clear the weeds from around some piles of stacked black walnut lumber.
This valuable lumber had been drying in the open for quite a while and needed to be protected. The plan was to re-stack it under a large semi trailer close by. Many of the slabs were two inches thick and very heavy. They were stacked on pallets that had rotted. High grass and evil thorny vines were all around them, but we conquered. We weed whacked, raked, and made a huge burn pile with all the bark and waste wood. We are tired but quite satisfied with our work. Welcome to North Carolina, Kevin M.
Fortunately we put dinner in the crock pot before we went out to tackle lumber piles. Tonight we are having beef/ barley/vegetable stew and some good looking cheesy bread we picked up at Publix this morning. We will probably be having Ibuprofen for dessert.
So, on to the weekend. The weather is still looking good and I’m hoping for a nice walk in a nearby park.
Wood we saved. Some slabs were actually 3 inches and as long as the trailer was wide. The burn pile.I spent a lot of time under this trailer today. Shady and cool.
I Just Have to Say... 