As the time for me to leave my job comes closer I have such a mixture of feelings.  Between now and October 11, my departure date, I am only scheduled for four days of work.  That’s a good thing because it means the new workers are getting a chance to get familiar with the routine.  I don’t know who the new day shift nurses are for sure.  I think we are still missing someone to work on the weekends because I’ve been scheduled to do them and have had to remind my employer that I can’t work on Saturdays and prefer not to work Sundays.  It’s been hard telling her that and she has gotten angry with me.  We’ve spent some days with bad attitude so thick in the room it’s overwhelming and spills out in sarcasm and criticism.

I was off last Thursday and she had a difficult day with a new nurse.  I don’t know if that was the reason for the peace and sense of relief that we had on Friday.  I know she was feeling a little better after a week of respiratory illness and was probably just tired from the previous day of constant talking, directing the new worker.  I felt sorry that she didn’t have a driver to help her get to church Saturday night so I volunteered.  I think that helped her feel like I still liked her and was intending to keep a good relationship if possible.  This is complicated – this leaving.

I know I’m going to miss the income, but I’m so looking forward to having time for other things that I don’t want to get seriously employed somewhere else right away.  A bit selfish perhaps.  I can live with that.  I’ve done some sewing and actually sold a baby carrier that I made.  A possible business idea?  And the new book I bought on making money with a blog is ready to read in my Kindle. Odd that when I should be eager to pursue writing I seem suddenly to have total writer’s block – no ideas – no inspirations – no desire. 

Last week I took the Aztek to the service center.  Two days I found it with a drained battery in the morning when it was time to drive to work.  One day I took the husband’s truck.  The second day he dropped me off and I rode the bike and the bus home. My ignition problems were supposed to have been fixed with the new ignition cylinder that was installed for $250.  Last night when I drove to my employer’s house I turned the key and once again, it wouldn’t turn to the off position.  I couldn’t get the key out.  My choices were accessories on or leave the engine running.  I turned the key to acc, took the fob off the key chain so I could lock the car, and left the key in it.  Coming back, I thought I had lost the fob and wasn’t going to be able to get the car unlocked.  In my church dress, in the dark I crawled under the car looking for a (non-existent) magnetic spare key holder. I  vaguely remembered having one once and wouldn’t it have been great to find it?  Is it time for me to get a new car? Of course it is because I’m quitting my job and we always quit our jobs before buying a major costly item, don’t we?  Just sayin’…