I Found Some Spring

Ever since about age eight or nine, I have been outside in April looking for spring to start in the northwoods. What I look for is a flower so small it is easily missed, but it is usually the first one to appear here. It has a special place in my heart. It’s called hepatica, mainly because of the leaf that has lobes like a liver (the prefix hepa refers to the liver). The leaf often turns dark under fallen leaves and snow but doesn’t completely deteriorate, which is probably why its flowers appear so early.

Mostly brown with a few pine greenery thrown in

I walked this week in the woods, hoping to get some inspiration from my friends, the trees. The woods are still pretty barren. The buds on the trees aren’t prominent and the landscape is pretty brown and grey. But I am delighted to have seen some spring – the flowers are here.

We always called them mayflowers, but I think that was descriptive of when they bloomed, not their actual name. White, pink, purple, blue are their usual colors and their stems have a delicate fuzziness to them. Sometimes a plant will have multiple blooms, sometimes just one. But they are life in the forest and I get a little thrill when I start finding them. It’s still April, so they are a bit early.

The leaves are from another plant, not hepatica

Maybe it’s because I am getting older that I notice aging in the forest more than I used to. I notice the older pines that are losing their lower branches, the ground around them littered with boughs that wind and snow brought down. I notice the dead trees, with bark peeling off and holes where birds have been hunting insects. Sometimes it’s a large tree that lost its hold and crashed down to the forest floor, its root bed sticking up in the air. There is a lot of destruction and death evident as a natural feature of the ecosystem. The woods looks quite messy at this time of year.

Sometimes it looks like there are more dead trees than living ones. Sad.
The woods can be a violent place of damage, destruction

Soon though, the ferns will be up, hiding much of the mess on the ground. Green leaves will cover up the mess above. Everything that died will continue to make its way back to the soil and nourish other life. It’s a beautiful pattern and has many lessons embedded in it. The patient, ever changing forest…

Maybe I was inspired out there, to record what I saw. It is a comforting thing, that spring has come at its appointed time once again. And I imagine that summer will come soon after. Seasons can be counted on, at least for now. This season, spring, is all about new things coming to life. Look for them. Just sayin’…

The early beginnings don’t shout to be seen, but they are there for those who will look.

Gwennie Ru and the Patched Heart

As I said in the previous post, Gwennie will be glad to read this someday and know her history.

I can think of a hundred happy adjectives to describe how I feel today about GwennieRu’s recent VSD surgery, but I will stick with relieved, grateful and blessed. She now has expectation of normal growth and lifespan. She may get discharged from the hospital today, which is absolutely amazing.

Surgery, originally scheduled for Thursday, was postponed to Friday morning. This was a good thing since it put her first on the surgeon’s list for the day. Julia and Kevin took Gwennie to the hospital early Friday morning, and difficult as it was, handed her over to the surgical team. The other grandma and I joined them in the waiting room.

The first hour in the OR, Gwennie was sedated (so glad they did that first) and then IV’s were inserted so that she could be connected to the heart lung machine. Then the surgery started and we were given hourly updates by the staff.

The surgeon had previously explained this process to us. After the heart lung machine was ready, her chest was opened and her heart was stopped so they could work on it. At Gwennie’s age her heart is about the size of a large strawberry so you can imagine how delicate this sewing job had to be.

The incision in the heart was made in the right atrium, and from there, the hole in the ventricle was accessed through the tricuspid valve. A dacron patch was stitched over the hole, which was described as being large. It was tested for leaks, and then the heart was closed and started back up again. Sounds simple, but I can’t even imagine how they did it without lasting damage to any nerves, or the heart itself. The doctor did say that they cool the heart down so it doesn’t need as much oxygen while it’s without circulation.

It was so hard to see her when she came out of recovery. But it was the knowledge that each one of the wires, tubes and drains had a vital part in keeping her safe that made it tolerable. The pain meds kept her sleeping a good part of that first day, but she did wake up and took her bottle that night.

A girls has got to eat…

The next day, Saturday, the drain and the pacer wires, the intra jugular port and a couple IV lines were removed. In the afternoon she was doing well enough to move to the step down unit.

Yesterday in step down, she was weaned off oxygen. She seemed very comfortable and without pain and was playing with her toes and toys like she normally does. Today, if all goes well, she may come home. Isn’t that amazing?!

So, for any of you who read my previous posts and had compassion, maybe offered up a prayer for Gwennie Ru, know that we appreciated that prayer. God gifted men and women with the ability to do some crazy stuff medically, and Gwennie Ru was in the right place and time to benefit from it. He was watching over her, and us as we waited.

Postscript: They are home!

Adventures at Julia’s House: Basement Saga part 2

The last time I wrote about the basement project at Julia’s house, the studs were being erected to compartmentalize the large open room. (Read about it here.) Since then, people who know about electricity and plumbing have been showing up. Our task was to be ready for the dry wall. We did our best.

It was the day of Gwennie’s doctor appointment last week. Julia, Gwennie and I had been in a rainy drive through the storm called Finn, and then a somewhat disappointing visit with the cardiologist. We were ready to go home and think about the day when we got a call from Daddy Kevin, back at the house. The call was accompanied by video.

“There is water coming in the basement. I happened to be down here and the leak started as I was looking. Did you see the video I sent? Oh, and the electricity is out so I can’t run the sump pump. They say we won’t have power until around 11 pm. Can you find a generator and bring it home?”

It is true that they had talked about getting a generator, because there have been storms before that took out power lines. But all the research necessary for getting the RIGHT generator hadn’t been done yet, and there was the matter of fitting it into the budget. And even now, the timing was not great on that account.

“Thank you God that we don’t have the drywall up yet.” This was Julia, being optimistic. “Can we just come home? We’ve had quite a day, with the storm and all. And I have the baby…”

“If you’re anywhere where there’s electricity, you’re better off than being here. It’s dark and uncomfortable.” That was Kevin, being not quite so optimistic.

So instead of turning off the highway on the road toward home, Julia kept driving north, while calling a good friend to get advice on buying a generator. I figured we were on our way to Reidsville, where the closest Lowe’s store was located.

I am deathly afraid of riding with Julia when she is researching things on her phone, so she graciously told me to look for generators for sale, and people who knew how to install and service them. I was reading reviews and giving her numbers to call. It turned out that it was not going to be easy to make this decision on the spur of the moment, and yet the vision of the water level creeping up the walls of the basement demanded some kind of solution.

I was hopeful when Julia went into Lowe’s. I stayed in the car with Gwennie, praying. However, she came out of the store later without a generator.

Back on the road, and still continuing north, I asked her where we were headed.

“I ordered a generator online from Sam’s Club. I had to choose delivery tomorrow because the order can’t be processed this late in the day. I did it online because there was only one left in stock. I didn’t want it to be sold out from under me! But we need it tonight, so we’re going to go get it.”

“But where are we going?” I asked this as we crossed the state line into Virginia.

“Danville, that’s the closest store that had one.”

When we finally arrived in Danville, the baby and I only stayed in the car a few minutes before she started crying (and before I had to go to the bathroom). By that time Julia was somewhere in the far reaches of Sam’s Club country and I couldn’t find her. After the restroom, we paced back and forth by the checkout registers, Gwennie, in her car seat, in a shopping cart, waiting and wondering.

Would the only generator in the store still be on the shelf? We were in a bad storm area and probably weren’t the only people suddenly needing a power source.

Well, some things about this story did turn out good. Julia appeared with a huge box on her cart. It only took about 20 minutes to find out how to change the sale from online to “immediate and off the shelf”. It only took two huge men to lift the thing into the car. It only took another hour to get home, and by then the power was back on anyway.

Remember, it’s all about the basement – that place that’s being remodeled so that someday Grandma can sell her trailer and have a room in the house when she visits. There will undoubtedly be another storm, and another power outage, and perhaps a need for a sump pump. But now, we have a generator, just sayin’.

Adventures at Julia’s House: Finn the Storm

We found out, shortly after her birth, that GwennieRu has a ventricular septal defect, a VSR for short. The murmur that the doctor heard led to a cardiac ultrasound and it was seen that there was a hole between two chambers of her heart. Because of the kind of tissue the hole was in, it was fairly certain that it would not correct itself as she grew. But we hoped and prayed for that anyway, because it was still possible.

Gwennie had a cardiologist appointment last Tuesday afternoon. We were eager to see if anything had changed. Julia had made sure she was free to take her at 2:30 pm, and I wanted to come along. As the morning progressed, I wondered if the predicted storm would make any alterations in our plans.

Around 1:00 pm Kevin showed me the weather radar on his phone. “There’s a band of severe wind and rain coming across your path at just about the time you have to be traveling,” he reported. I wondered if he was thinking that we shouldn’t go, but no more was said.

I made sure Gwennie was ready and the diaper bag was packed as I anticipated Julie’s arrival. Then I got a text from her.

I think lots of things that I never say to people. In this case I was thinking…

Isn’t this kind of crazy?

We have a serious storm out there.

I have only driven your new fangled hybrid car once, and it made me feel stupid.

You feel okay trusting this old woman grandma to do this alone with this precious child?”

Pushing doubt, fear, and good sense aside, I decided I had better get going so I could go slowly and have time for all the uncertainties. Julia and Kevin thought I could do this, so maybe I could.

I packed up the child and carried her quickly through the rain to the car. Car frustration started at once. I discovered the car wouldn’t start until I buckled my seat belt. Halfway down the drive, I saw a warning from the computer. “Service required” it said with a picture of a tire and an exclamation mark. Knowing that service was not going to happen, I kept driving. It didn’t feel like a flat tire, so maybe one of them was a little low on air.

Weather alerts were coming through on my phone. Authorities were telling people not to go anywhere unless they had been ordered to evacuate. There was a lot of flooding on the roadways. About that time, I saw emergency lights ahead where a large truck was blocking my lane. A tree had just fallen across half the road and cars were taking turns going around it on the remaining lane.

The rain was coming down hard as I pulled into the equine hospital parking lot. Julia’s vet truck came in a minute later. I was glad she was going to be driving the rest of the way to the appointment. She scrambled in and we were on our way again.

This storm impressed us both. There was a lot of water on the roads. Sometimes there would be a low spot with enough water that Julia would suddenly grab the wheel tight to keep us going straight. Once, a car in an oncoming lane sent so much water flying through the air that it hit our windshield like a rock, shocking us. Almost every car had flashers on, and we saw several stalled cars when we got into the city.

Fortunately, by that time the band of severe weather was nearly past. The wind was calmer and the rain wasn’t as scary. We made it to the clinic. Julia let Gwennie and I out at the front door and went to park.

GwennieRu, none the worse for her harrowing ride, plays with her toes while waiting for her exam.

In retrospect, maybe we should have cancelled the appointment, but, as I said, it was an important one. We had so hoped to hear that open heart surgery would not be needed for tiny GwennieRu. That was not the case. Surgery was still the recommendation and the doctor made a strong case for it. It is scheduled for February 8th.

They say that children her age recover quickly, much better than older children. The normal progression is 4 days in the hospital and then home, with only Tylenol for pain. Complications are not common, and the expectation for complete recovery and full activity are the norm.

Thank God (and I do) that we didn’t die on the way to the appointment.

There is that element of risk, in varying degrees, to every adventure that I can think of. It’s the adrenaline rush, the seriousness of what one is doing, and what could happen that makes an adventure burn its way into our memories. I don’t think I’ll forget about this one.

Small, Useful Fire: #2

A series of memories around a fascinating subject – fire.

Those two trees were a major fixture in the backyard. At one time, before we moved there, they even had a border of heavy timbers defining the area around them, because it was hard to mow around their roots. I especially like trees, at least most all of them, so it was hard when some kind of beetle infested them and they began to die. I clearly remember the day when my landscaping friend and his brother came over to cut them down, carefully, one piece at time, until there were only stumps.

The mound, covered with ferns, but the stumps are in there.

I don’t like stumps nearly as much as I like trees, although I have done some interesting things with them. These stumps were not the interesting kind at all. It was an easy decision to get rid of them, but not so easy to figure out how. Although they had been cut very short, they had multiple exposed roots and the mound on which they sat seemed impenetrable. There are people who would have hired a stump grinder or a backhoe and the stumps would have been torn out in a hour. But, I have never been a big machinery person, and I am patient. A small, useful fire would be just the thing…

And so it began. Numerous campfires were built on the mound and the stumps got smaller. It wasn’t quick, because they were stumps at least eighteen inches in diameter, and our campfires were always extinguished within an hour or two.

Then came the day that I decided to clean the file drawers. Years worth of bank statements, old tax returns, outdated warranties and instructions for things we no longer owned, and more – it all had to be destroyed and paying to have it shredded was not an option. It was not an option because I like to burn things (things that should be burned).

I sat by the stumps, feeding the fire for hours, shifting my position to keep out of the smoke. By evening all the paper was gone but the mound still glowed with heat. I did not want to douse it with water but for safety’s sake, I did. Smoke billowed out. The flames disappeared.

Smoke rises from one of the outlying roots, still burning.

The next morning, I saw a small trail of smoke, rising from the mound. It looked like a small volcano. The ground was still warm too, and I realized that fire had been slowly advancing underground, along the roots, during the night. The mound was collapsing. I couldn’t have been happier.

Fire underground. Who would have thought of its usefulness?

This story also reminded me of the underground fires in Centralia, PA. We drove through the area and saw wisps of smoke rising randomly over the landscape. The coal mind there has been on fire for over 60 years. That fire has turned Centralia into a ghost town. As fires go, it is neither small or useful.

Small, Useful Fires: #1

A series of memories around a fascinating subject – fire.

The cook stove sits in my dining room now. It isn’t hooked to a chimney and never holds a fire. Instead it serves as a bookcase for cookbooks and a plant holder for the pot of ivy.

Old, and out to rest

It was the center of life in my grandmother’s kitchen and it was most probably the start of my attraction to small, useful fires. My young self found it irresistible and I would watch when Grandma put the iron handle in the round cover and lifted it off the firebox. The wood had to be split small, and only three or four pieces would fit in at a time, but it burned hot when asked. It cooked Sunday dinner for us most every week while we went to church.

I remember the kitchen as it was then, half of a larger room where the meal was served. Imagining a clock face, the cook stove would have been at 1.

A long counter with cupboards above and below took up the whole north wall to the right of the stove. The double sink was somewhere near the middle of the counter underneath a wide window looking out on the driveway. This wall would be numbers 2, 3, and 4 on the clock.

Number 5 would begin the east wall and it started with the wash basin, a single porcelain piece with rust water stains and a “swill pail” underneath. It was where working hands were washed, where Grandpa shaved as he looked at himself in the metal cabinet hanging on the wall. On a hook to the right of the sink hung things like a towel, a fly scatter, an apron and a razor strap. That is all I know of razor straps because I never saw it being used for shaving, although I might have heard that one could be used for whipping naughty children. I probably read that somewhere.

Number 6 on the clock face would be the front door leading out to the porch that ran part way along the east side of the house. The wall next to the door held the refrigerator, and a long wooden raised box. It was a curious piece of furniture that might have been a planter, but was always filled with magazines, newspapers and “stuff”. It was a little less than waist high and may have had a shelf below. I am surprised that I don’t remember more about it because I know I helped Grandma dust and clean it in later years. Above this box was the east window and the phone, fastened to the wall near the corner.

Number 7 was the door to Grandma’s bedroom, which was almost always open, probably to keep it as warm as possible. The door began the south wall and next to it was the china cupboard, and then a freezer, numbers 8 and 9.

Turning the corner, numbers 10 and 11 on the west wall contained a long “bureau” as Grandma would have called it. There were pictures, stacks of letters, small china knick knacks holding collection of buttons and curiosities adorning the top of this piece. It had drawers storing tablecloths and pretty, useless things Grandma was saving. I was curious about their contents and I know I looked in them from time to time, but don’t remember what I saw. At the ends of the bureau were doors hiding more things I desired to look into, but didn’t. Back then, there was a sense of privacy, even in Grandma’s house.

The last number on the clock face, 12, was near the middle of the west wall. It was the door into the living room. To the right of it stood the cook stove. We have gone full circle. In the south half of the room was the dining table. We all sat there to eat no matter how many of us there were. It was also the table where Grandma wrote countless letters to her daughters, her friends and to me. The center of the table always held the salt and pepper, butter, perhaps a vial of vinegar, napkins. And it was covered with a small cloth. Grandma had a special spoon that she liked, and a favorite cup that she made sure was always set at her place on the table.

Whatever this is, I have it.

And this. A small plate-like piece of china. It was not named, but was always there where it belonged, without question. It held a hot cup, like a coaster, or a wet spoon, or tea bag.

The cook stove baked bread, cookies and cakes, roasted meat and fried potatoes and kept the kitchen warm, when the warmth was needed, and when it wasn’t. When the firebox was full of embers and ash, Grandma would jiggle a lever at the back and the ashes would fall into metal box below. The cooled ashes were taken out periodically and thrown on the lawn or garden. When the fire went out overnight, as happened often, Grandma would be up early to get it going again. She had an old can that held corncobs, soaking in some kind of flammable liquid. That and some newspaper would be her firestarters. Soon there would be heat enough to warm the room and begin cooking. I remember looking at and touching a bird wing, kept on the upper warming shelf of the stove. The feathers were spread and it fit neatly into the hand of the person sweeping off the smooth iron cook surface.

Yes, the cook stove was definitely where it began, my affinity with small, useful fire.

Becoming Grandma: Time Goes On

Day 11

It is becoming clear that this time in North Carolina will not be a daily posting opportunity. The time is going by so quickly, and the schedule is… well, there is no schedule. Instead, I’m going to record stories the way I remember them. After this, no more numbering the days.

Last week was a whirlwind of activity. On Wednesday Julia had a day off work, so we packed up Gwennie Ru and did a shopping trip. She slept in her car seat, even as we were in and out of stores.

My other event of the day was driving an hour away to Raleigh to pick up Esther at the airport. We had planned to both be here in NC for a couple of reasons. One, we were going to attend an additional memorial service for Dennis, my husband, in Pennsylvania. We planned to have a girl’s road trip with three generations in the car – me (the aged one), Julia and Esther (the middles) and Gwennie Ru. This service was for the Pennsylvania relatives and friends who were unable to attend the service in July. It was also for Julia, since she hadn’t been able to travel then either. More about that later.

The following day, I hadn’t even dried off from my shower when Julia called. She and Gwennie Ru had been having some symptoms of a cold and she was worried about the way Gwennie kept rubbing her ears. She wanted to make sure there was no ear infection going on before we went on our PA trip. She had been able to get an appointment with the pediatrician. Could I get Gwennie there in an hour or so?

So you may be thinking, what’s the big deal about that? And that was what I told myself to quell those sneaky little twinges of panic that leapt up from who knows where. I can take someone’s precious newborn in my car and drive half an hour through an unfamiliar city and present her, with the correct information, to an unknown band of professionals. No sweat.

And that’s what happened. We got through the trip, two short feedings, a dirty diaper, and exams by an intern and a doctor. Gwennie was well behaved and had perfectly fine ears. Truly, this is why I start every day in prayer, asking for help with unexpected tasks, and end every day grateful to God who understands and hears.

Gwennie having some Auntie time with Esther

A to Z Challenge: Zeal of the Pioneers

Zeal, “great energy or enthusiasm in pursuit of a cause or objective”.

Alzina, or Alzie as we have come to know her, was passionate about her faith and her family. But she had zeal toward another objective as well, one that took up a great deal of time later in her life after she retired from teaching. The cause was prohibition of alcohol. She learned from a young age to work for the cause and although “Prohibition” never became a federal law, it was adopted in some states, Kansas being one of them. It happened largely through the efforts of hard working pioneer women. Here is how it went for Alzie.

The Peach Crop Story

By Emma Pomeroy Brandt, Alzie’s younger sister.

A few years after the Civil War, in 1867, my father took a homestead in Kansas. On it he planted both shade and fruit trees, including a peach orchard. He could not go to a store and buy everything as we do now. Indeed he and Mother saw very hard times trying to get a home started and raise food for a growing family. They had gotten deeply in debt and placed a mortgage on the homestead.

One year when most crops were burning up, they had a bountiful crop of peaches, but no market to sell them. One day two well-dressed men came driving in behind a fine team of livery horses and offered Father one dollar a bushel for the whole crop.

That seemed a wonderful offer and Father started to tell them he would bring the first load the next day. He said he would pick them carefully so as not to bruise them. “Oh”, they said, “you need not be too careful. Just shake them off and scrape them up. If you get a few rotten ones, it won’t make any difference.” Then Father asked, “What are you going to do with them, that you will take rotten ones?” They answered, “We are going to make peach brandy.”

That was a big shock to Father. He thought of his debt and his family needs, and then “me, a Christian man, sell my peaches to make brandy???” They told him he would be a fool to turn down their offer when he could not sell them elsewhere. But he said, “I am raising children. They shall never be tempted to drink brandy made from MY peaches.”

So the deal was called off. He struggled on for years, and had to sell his farm to pay the mortgage, but he kept a clear conscience. He moved his family across the road onto the “timber claim” and made there the home where we five younger children were born, and which was named “Prairie Home”. I can’t remember that we ever had to go hungry for lack of food.

Later, around 1907, Alzie’s mother Philena wrote to Alzie describing her “mother’s club” which she had started for local women. These women were wives of men who were working on the railroad. The husband’s wages were often spent in the bars, leaving the women to find a way to support the family. Seeing situations like this as she was growing up, and attending local Temperance Meetings with her family, made Alzie a staunch supporter of the temperance movement. Partially retired from teaching she took work as a field secretary for the National Prohibition Party. She traveled around the United States securing pledges and support for her Party’s candidates for general elections. There were many disappointments in her work, but her zeal was undaunted, as this paragraph in a letter explains.

“I gave much time in 1941 and 1942 to work for an initiative amendment, but failed to get enough signatures in time. But I learned many lessons, and more than ever came to the feeling that the Prohibition Party is the only force that God can use to overthrow the liquor traffic. It is the “Joshua and Caleb” of the dry movement. But, as the majority kept the people of Israel out of the Promised Land forty years, so the “old party drys” may keep from having prohibition that long, too. But the Prohibition Party will be victorious in the end as Joshua and Caleb were.”

There was no lasting success, although Kansas was a state that wrote a prohibition amendment in its constitution, and upheld it longer than any other state. Follow this link to read about some amazing women activists of the Temperance movement. Kansas and Prohibition

My grandfather John, sister Esther (seated), mother Alzina and sister Ethel. There were many more stories of their pioneer life but there are only 30 days in April. #April A to Z Blogging Challenge. Thank you for reading.

A to Z Challenge: Yearnings

Alzina Boone, widowed at a young age and with a family of four children to support, finds herself struggling to be a teacher at school, and a mother at home. In the early days of Kansas settlement, life was not easy for anyone, much less a single parent. Her faith in a caring God, and sheer necessity kept her going when others might have given up. She was my great grandmother and these are her true stories.

“Life was full of interest to all of us, and when I heard the words in song, “earth has no charms for me” I realized that I might easily forget eternal things, if I didn’t earnestly purpose in my heart to “set my affections on things above”. The song “Nearer, My God to Thee” which has words “even though it be a cross that raises me” became my earnest prayer, as I thought of how fleeting are earth’s joys and how liable to change. A sense of impending danger and sorrow haunted me for some weeks after school closed. But my spirit rose above all dread and fear when I read the words in Psalm 145:18,19 one morning, about June 15th, in morning worship. “The Lord is nigh unto all them that call upon him. He will fulfill the desire of them that fear Him.” This assured me that God was nearer to me than any danger, and I felt safe and light heartedly happy in His keeping. This presence bore me up even when the blow fell.

On June 28 Stanley was drowned while swimming in a creek a mile from home after 6 o’clock.

He had told us at noon that he wanted to go swimming after office hours and would be home an hour late. He was always careful to tell me where and when he was going and to return on time to give me no anxiety. So when he didn’t return before sundown, I knew something detained him. I got neighbors to go with John to find him. They brought his lifeless body home about 9 o’clock that night. While they were searching, some Christian women workers from the Faith Home came to comfort and help me and the girls. I went to my room to pray alone. I found myself praying more for Stanley’s spiritual safety than for physical safety and the words of scripture “It is well with the child.” came to me forcibly from the presence that seemed so near me. I was sustained and comforted even in the loss and grief I felt when they came with his body and called me to the door, saying “We found him. He is dead.”

A doctor had been called to join the search. He said the water was too cold and had given cramps to Stanley, making him helpless in the water. Had anyone been with him, they would probably have drowned with him. But how I wished I had not consented to him going swimming that night. But as I prayed, many comforting memories and messages were given me. Stanley had assured me that he wasn’t afraid of lightening as we watached a storm approaching on Wednesday night on our way home from prayer meeting. He said, “I know I’m ready now.” How it comforts the Christian loved ones when the departed dear ones leave the testimony that they are “ready”.

I longed for a visit from Stanley as I had been given in dreams of Milford Sylvester, but I did not pray for such a blessing, for so much had already been given me in proof of God’s care for Stanley. But God did give me such a dream, even if I didn’t ask for it. I dreamed I was late to prayer meeting and all were kneeling in prayer, many near the door. When we rose from prayer, a song was started and I sang too. I noticed a surprised look from the leaders toward my part of the room. So I looked around to see what was surprising and there stood Stanley, book in hand, singing too. When the meeting was dismissed, Stanley passed out with the crowd. I remembered I wanted to hear Stanley talk, so I hurried out and overtook him. I asked, “How do you like your new home, Stanley?”

He replied in his own dear voice, “Well Mamma, you know I never liked to move to a new place, but always after I got moved I liked the new place and wanted to fence it off and stay there forever. Well, it is just the same now in heaven, only always before there was something I lacked and longed for. Now that something I always lacked and longed for is in me and all around me.” And as he said this, I felt that he was filled with a bliss that I could not express. I believe God gave me the dream. “

A to Z Challenge: Xanguish

A family with 9 children survives life on the Kansas prairie in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. The experiences they have illustrate the joys, sorrows, hardships and everyday life of the Midwest pioneers. This faith filled series of stories is true. The eldest child was my great grandmother Alzina Pomeroy Boone.

There are not enough words beginning with x, so I will take the liberty of making one up. The word is “xanguish”. It stands for extreme anguish, and I have to say that this story broke my motherly heart.

Stanley, in the back row, second from the right. Probably a graduation picture from 8th grade.

This said it all. I can only imagine the grief.