This post was prompted by a cartoon I saw on a T shirt. Three horses, wide eyed. The first one “What if that stick moved?!” The second one, “What if it didn’t move?!” The third one, “Let’s spook!” I am a bit spooky at times.
A long time ago, back in Wisconsin when I was a young mother, I got a pastoral visit from my minister. He listened patiently to my angst about hearing from God. I didn’t have a handle on how an invisible God who says He is always with me could give me directions. When all those people in the Bible heard voices telling them what to do (think “go to a mountain and sacrifice your son” type of message…) were they really hearing a spoken voice, or the voice in their head? And if it was that voice in their head, was it more than just a feeling or a conviction? How did they know it was God and not just themselves remembering a nightmare (think “go against this vast army with 100 of your best men” type of message…)? I had children to raise. I needed to know.
This is what he told me. “You think too much.”
Well, just like a person who thinks too much, I’ve been thinking about this for years. It was a very observant assessment.
I read a story about a person who was about to board a flight with their family. As they were lining up to traverse the jetway they got the message to not go, from God. They were Christians and evidently in very close communication with their heavenly Father so they didn’t board the plane. The plane crashed and all on it were killed. I think about this frequently, actually every time I get on a plane, and wonder if I would have the guts to waste a ticket that I’ve paid dearly for based on a gut feeling that I shouldn’t get on the plane. How weird would that be? Then I wonder if the fact that I’m thinking about it, is God telling me to do it. Then I get on the plane and fly to where ever it is I’m going.
The good thing that I’ve learned about God is that he knows me better than I know myself. I’ve seen the things he’s made and figured out so my confidence in his genius leadership has developed. After all, if he’s taken on responsibility for all these people who sign up to be on his team, he must be one awesome, amazing leader. Does he know I think too much? Yes. Does he know how to get me to do something? Probably. When I’m willing to follow orders will he leave me wondering? I don’t think so. If I’m not supposed to be on the plane, he will send someone to drag me off. He made me. He knows me. He loves me even when I think too much.
I”m just sayin’, if he weren’t that awesome, he wouldn’t be God.