A to Z Challenge: Opal

April 18, 2023 ShirleyjdietzLeave a comment

Character sketches that are fictional, but based on real people, like you and me.

Not many people have an Opal in their friend list these days. I didn’t call her that either, because she insisted on being called Paulette, but Opal was indeed her name.

Opal was a little loud, with a laugh that would wake the dead. I encountered her on cleaning days. We worked for the same client and on cleaning days I had to make sure I was not needing to be in the rooms where Opal would start. It was important to be out of her way.

I would hear the door slam, followed by Opal’s screech as she ordered her daughter Shelley to bring in the mop bucket and mop. Shelley always came along because she was somewhat mentally impaired and Opal had no safe place to leave her.

Opal was single, which was not surprising.

Somewhere along the way Opal had become very distrustful of men. As a result she had an independent streak as wide as the ocean. She drove a big van full of power tools and cleaning supplies. She dressed in old T-shirts and coveralls. There was no task so manly that Opal would not try to do it herself. Yard clean-up was her specialty. She could rake, trim bushes and haul debris to the road for pick-up with the best of them.

I had no problem with Opal’s short “man cut” of her own wiry, gray hair but it bothered me that she did it to Shelley too. Just when Shelley’s soft brown curls were getting long enough to look like a hairdo of sorts, Opal would chop them off. It took me a while to realize that this was purposeful. She wanted Shelley to look as unattractive as possible, for her own protection. As I said, she was very distrustful of men.

But Opal had a loyal heart. It was her brash, assuming nature that often had people at odds with her. She would decide to do something she hadn’t been asked to do, with disastrous results. She would offend, and in turn be offended. But after an appropriate length of time, she would patch things up and reappear, as helpful as ever.

Like the time she decided to wash our client’s transport van with the pressure washer… or the windy day she tried to dock her pontoon boat, oh, or the day she set out to trap the raccoons. Yes, that was classic Opal.

Organizing: Can Cleaning Closets Build Relationship?

April 18, 2022 Shirleyjdietz8 Comments

I wouldn’t have thought organizing was an activity, or that by doing it, we could be working on our relationships, but it was and we did. However, my two daughters gave me completely different experiences of organization.

One of them, (not saying which one) had her ways and was very particular. You could take a look at her sock drawer, every pair bundled and stacked according to color and thickness, and you knew what kind of a kid you were dealing with. I couldn’t really say she was a collector, but she seldom got rid of anything so she had to organize to make the best use of her space. That is who she was at twelve, that is pretty much how she is today.

The other one only organized certain things, on occasion. We had some very sweet relationship building times cleaning her room. I would come in, sit down on the bed, if I could find it, and we would pick up one thing at a time and ask “where does this go?” Eventually it would all get into place. She loved a clean room but it wasn’t a necessity. She gives me credit for the quotable sentence “A messy room is not an indictment, it’s an opportunity.” For us, it was an opportunity to spend time together (and find lost stuff…).

Our times together organizing have a somewhat different flavor, now that we are all adults. When I visit them, we often go through closets, looking for things to fold, stack, throw away and give away. Those are hard chores that people tend to put off doing, but they are easier when there are two of us. We might even love going through kitchen cupboards, rearranging, and finding out what’s in there.

I especially like seeing all their shoes. Believe it or not, their shoe choices (and whether or not there are both a right and a left to be found) give me clues as to what is going on in their lives. Has she gone sensible yet, or is she really wearing those six inch heels? Has she been feeling the need for shopping therapy or is she okay? There are clues to all these things.

I am always making out pretty good after these organizing sessions. Both girls give me clothes they don’t want any more. That is the only reason I have anything from Nordstrom’s in my closet. But, speaking of my closet, I’m about due for some organization soon and plan to have that fun activity on the schedule the next time I get a visit.

By organizing and sharing our various ways of creating order, we have helped each other, we have been productive, we’ve communicated values, and we’ve spent time together. It’s been good for our relationships, and actually, we’ve found a lot of missing stuff.

A to Z Challenge: Letter O for Organization

April 17, 2020April 18, 2020 ShirleyjdietzLeave a comment

First, I will say that O is not my favorite letter.

Organization, in the caregiver’s world, is absolutely critical. Nothing goes right without it and I can’t emphasize that enough, although I’m going to try.

Take, for instance, the organization of pills, medicines, and supplements. The husband is an avid proponent of any pill with a promise, and they all have a promise. I don’t blame him, so if he wants another vitamin and we can afford it, I buy it for him. But my least favorite job is keeping all his pills organized where he can find them, or even where I can find them. So I’m going to share with you some ways of organizing that you may find helpful.

You can organize by bottle size

Bottle cap color, useful when you can only view them from the top.

Or by bottle color, if you have to view them from the bottom.

I’m not sure how this would ever be useful. So be it.

And people who get a fixation on alphabetizing everything can do this.

I think they try to do this at the pharmacy. It doesn’t work. I’ve spent hours looking for things.

To go a little deeper, pills can be organized according to when they are taken, morning or evening, or whatever time of the day you like to take them.

I am familiar with all the husband’s pills to the point of having feelings for individual ones. Some I disdain, some I admire. In the process of handling them I organize them in categories according to size

According to color

According to how easily I think they can be swallowed

And according to whether they roll around and have to be picked up off the floor.

I hope someone finds this helpful because there are times when we caregivers need any help we can get. There are times when playing with pills may be our only emotional outlet, and I say go with it.

I am a caregiver. Welcome to my world.

A to Z: Selling Our House (Letter O)

April 17, 2018April 17, 2018 Shirleyjdietz6 Comments

The letter O is featured prominently in this compelling, informative, and well lit sign. Hats off to the Irish for this one.

Still feeling under the weather so this will be short.

The sign went up. “Open House today 10 am – 2 pm” The listing had run for several days with a fair amount of interest. The realtor and assistant were manning the event and were optimistic. The place looked great, and well it should have after the month of preparation, and thousands of dollars of love and care. The owners had opted to be out of town which was fine with the realtor. It was always easier that way.

Although it doesn’t often happen like this, except in movies (or on HGTV), the first couple in the door spent a long time looking things over, looking at the house from different angles and wandering the shady yard. They were interested and planning.

The third party came 45 minutes later and were clearly investors looking for income property. They were setting up an offer, unofficially, when the first couple came back in and overheard their conversation. By this time, the planners had already envisioned themselves living in the upper story of the loft house. Their kids were happily taking over the bedrooms on the ground floor and their parents were living next door in the second house. The investors were a threat to the plan. There was nothing to do but offer full price, immediately. Or maybe over the asking price just to make sure.

And so it was that the house elicited an offer on the first open house, having only been on the market for four days. The couple was pre-approved with a credible loan. Since the house was empty and waiting, had been inspected and certified, there was nothing to delay the sale. The closing was set in two weeks and went off without a hitch. The Oneacrewoods passed to new ownership, and it was bittersweet.

Disclaimer: This account is entirely fictional and is the product of the letter O. The house has not yet listed or had an Open House. But, it is possible something like this could happen, just sayin’…