December Wreckage

I crashed. Taking off from my walking challenge was intentional Christmas Day. I don’t know what happened the day after that but no walking was done then either, (Oh, that’s right, it was the husband’s birthday. He got my walking time.) By Saturday night I was like wreckage. I sprawled in the recliner and looked terrible, felt terrible, and probably acted terrible. I was complaining and practically weeping as I tried to explain it to mom and my brother and niece. The frustrating part was not knowing why the sudden drop in energy, motivation, positivity. Was I sick (Covid, aaaagh!) or was I having endorphin withdrawal? Was that even a thing?

Yeah, two in a row. Not good.

I forced myself back on the treadmill last night and tonight. I guess I feel better, but it was really strange and I’m not completely out of that bad space yet. Honestly, it was having to report in here that kept me from quitting – and the fact that my family was laughing at supporting me and being sympathetic. Thank you guys.

After my pity party over at Mom’s I was walking back to my condo and momentarily all the bad stuff was forgotten. The snow that had been drifting in all day, and the dark, and the lights were so arresting I had to stop in the freezing cold and just look. The snowflakes were so large and flat that the light reflected off them everywhere. The dark sky was a complete contrast to the glittery, sparkles on the ground. Winter moments like these are the reason I can stand to live up here.

I wish pictures could do justice to what I saw. Not even close…

I Don’t Care

I’m all cared out for today.  The trouble is I’m going on a ten day trip in the morning.  I should be packing, but I don’t care.  I’m going to do it differently and just not pack anything.  I’m going to get up in the morning, get dressed and go to the airport.  I’ll take my computer and my night mouth guard.  Maybe some underwear.

Will this have consequences in the following week?  Maybe, maybe not.  That’s why it will be a great experiment.

It will be nice not to have luggage while I’m traveling.

I can wear the same thing all week.  I can go to the thrift shop. It will be fun.  Maybe it won’t be fun.

I don’t care.