The Joys of Hiking with Friends: A Personal Reflection

I’m not sure why hiking with friends seems like such a novel activity for me. I’ve always liked hiking, and taking walks with people but it didn’t used to happen very often. Now that I am retired, on my own, and motivated to stay active it’s different. It’s more frequent, of course, but it’s also more vital. It serves so many purposes.

I’m reflecting on this topic as I’m wrapping up posts on the Door County hike. One night at dinner I had to tell our group that I appreciated them. I appreciated all the planning that went into making the trip a success. I didn’t have to do any of it, and that was a new vacation experience for me. I appreciated visiting a new and interesting place and not having to do it alone. I appreciated the length of time we spent, the many conversations, the shared interests in nature and hiking (and eating…). I appreciated having women friends who were willing to spend time, effort and money having fun together. I appreciated that we were all healthy enough to walk a few miles at a time without complaining. It was great. I wanted them to know it was a blessing to be with them.

And then I started thinking about all the other times walking filled a need. Needs for friendship, family connection, inspiration, comfort, and relaxation can all easily be met through a walk with a friend. Walking and talking go together so naturally. The pace can be adjusted for reflection. Periods of silence are comfortable (especially when climbing hills). And since I usually walk in quiet places, I’m not struggling to hear conversation. I can concentrate on my hiking partner.

I can’t ignore how wonderful hiking is for my physical health either. I would even hike alone for that reason, but it’s more certain to happen with friends. On the days when I get my 10,000 or more steps in, I sleep better, think better, and worry less. I wish everyone could walk a distance, and I feel sorry for those who can’t.

The five women who went on the Door County weekend with me are members of the Birkie Girls hiking group. The group is much larger, with a variety of ages, stages of life and physical abilities. They meet every Tuesday at 10 am for a hike somewhere chosen by the planners for the month. Two hours is allowed for hiking. By noon they are usually at a restaurant for lunch, or doing the bag lunch thing. Fellowship is a big part of the plan. The special trips farther away are open to all, but only happen a couple times a year.

I have other friends who love to get together to be active. Among them is my friend Gwen who hiked the Birkie Trail with me a couple years ago. I’ve started hiking it again with another friend, Elizabeth. Truth is, I’m always thinking of people I’d like to invite to hike with me – people I’d like to get to know better. Hiking with friends is so worthwhile. I have to say, it is one of my greatest joys.

Door County WI: Leaving Ephraim

We had a good two night stay at Pine Grove Resort in Ephraim. After breakfast, we packed up and left for the other side of the peninsula. This morning’s hike was in Newport Bay State Park on the Lynd Point Trail. On the way there were many nice farms, orchards and vineyards. The cherry trees were in bloom, as we had hoped.

Taken out the window of a moving car. Aren’t they pretty?

Newport Bay State Park is on the Lake Michigan side of the peninsula, near its tip. It is a long park stretching down the coast quite a way. The wind gets pretty fierce on this side, coming off the lake. Our hike started out on the leeward side of a point where the wind was not bad. We rounded the point and it was a different story. The rocks and beaches were magnificent. The forests are mostly cedar, hemlock, beech, and maple. The wind and waves made a lot of noise which diminished quickly when the path turned inland. The end of our path was a very long board walkway through a fern grotto, and was easy walking. The other parts of the path were rocky, lots of roots, and some fallen trees to step over. All in all, a nice adventure with a lot of variety.

It was too early for lunch when we finished so we went further south to Caves County Park. This park is in the middle of Whitefish Dunes State Natural Area. The lake has worn away rock outcroppings into cavelike features along the shore, which are very interesting. From what locals say, it is almost always windy on this side of the peninsula. There are always waves. We took some selfies of our group, being careful not to step too close to the edge. It was a tiny bit scary, at least for me, because I have an imagination.

We went just a little farther to Whitefish Dunes to sit and have our lunch. It was windy but there was sun and it was pleasant. The beach here is suddenly wide and sandy, a marked change from the rocky bluffs.

They were putting in a ramp down to the beach from the level where we ate our lunch.

Tonight we are in Bailey’s Harbor at the Beachfront Inn. It truly does front right on to the beach. It is a quaint, older style of motel. The doors have real keys tagged with the room number. I was parked about three steps from our door. There are so many things on the peninsula that make it look like New England. The many cottages and Victorian houses have lush green lawns and flowers. There are boats in the harbors and gulls in the sky giving a definite nautical feel. Bailey’s Harbor is a little less choppy and there is a small breakwater that shelters our waterfront. For a few feet the water is almost still, which is something I haven’t seen all day.

Our dinner destination is just across the road from our Inn. Chives, a fine dining restaurant, is said to be a “homey eatery with small, medium and large plates of upscale New American eats amid rustic-chic digs.” When did restaurants become eaterys? What is a New American eat? How do you upscale it? And what should I expect of a rustic-chic environment? I’m looking forward to learning a few things tonight. I would like to know who writes descriptions like this too.

Have you ever eaten fiddlehead ferns? Ramp? Yeah, me neither until this meal.

We are hoping to come back to our “sleepery” after dinner and sit out by the gas fire pit. I hope the wind dies down a little so it isn’t so cold. The rocking chairs out there are rocking all by themselves.

It was just too cold to stay here even though it was very picturesque.

Door County Vacation

Yes, I get to take a vacation. It means I get to travel someplace of my choice, for the express purpose of seeing a place I have not seen before, not staying with relatives and on a budget that is predetermined and saved for. It’s so nice.

Door County is in my home state, Wisconsin, but on the opposite side from where I live. I’m still getting the geography straight, but in general I know that it’s on a peninsula with Green Bay on one side and Lake Michigan on the other.

It took us over 6 hours to travel here from Hayward. We started at 9 and stopped for lunch at Rib Mountain State Park. The sign at Rib Mountain said it was the highest point in Wisconsin – 1940 ft. above sea level. That doesn’t seem very high, but at the top of the observation tower the view was WOW! This was in spite of the rain, and the wind gusting to 40 mph every now and then. I say lunch, but what I mean was that I ate an avocado and a yellow bell pepper, in the car in the parking lot. We did stop at Starbucks at the bottom of the mountain. We needed to warm up. It’s cold, in the 50’s, uncharacteristic of this time of year.

I am traveling with my friend Lisa, and four other hiking buddies from the Birkie Girls Hiking Group. We are in three cars, trying to keep each other in sight on the road, and not get too separated .

This dog statue was at the distillery, I don’t know why. I didn’t have permission yet to post pics of my friends, so you get the dog instead.

Further up the road we stopped in at Door County Distillery, which is famous for beverages made with cherries, or maybe just tasting like cherries. The countryside here is full of wineries and distilleries and restaurants that serve local fare. Since the big lake is here all around us there is a nautical feel about the place. Lots of fish themed places, seagulls sitting in the fields, and boat decor.

We arrived in Ephraim around 4 pm and checked into Pine Grove Resort just in time for chocolate chip cookies, cheese and crackers and wine in the front lobby. They are generous and the rooms are very nice. We have a small balcony with a view of the bay.

After a brief conclave in our leader’s room, we set out for a nearby eating place in Sister’s Bay. It was recommended by our hotel manager as being reasonably priced and well liked by locals. Sisters Bay Bowl had a small bowling alley with half a dozen lanes. No one was bowling but the restaurant was full, as was the bar.

My steak meal. The waiter was nice and I gave him a good tip.

We had a great meal, with pleasant, friendly service. I think everyone liked their food. We were hungry. Lisa and I split a piece of cherry pie with ice cream. I have made a goal of having something with cherries in it every day because this is cherry country if nothing else. The cherry trees do have blossoms on them even though it feels like winter here.

Back to our rooms for a few minutes of watching news before bed. I was hoping for a better weather report for tomorrow, but no. It will still be cold and wet, but we are here to hike – outside if possible, inside galleries and shops if not.

More tomorrow.

August 9, 2024 Friday and the Weekends

There are many words that I say without thinking too hard about what I am saying.  The word “weekend” is one of those – most everyone knows what that word means.  Since I have been studying a new language (Spanish), I think more about what I’m actually saying in English. If a weekend is really the end of the week, it can be only one day, not two. Our two day weekend is actually weekends, one being on the front end and the other on the back. The first day and the last compromise the two ends of the week. Just thought I’d share that for no good reason. 

The days in between the two ends have gone so quickly. Wednesday, hump day, started with a bed headache and a poor night’s sleep. But it quickly got better because on that day I was reunited with my car. The auto body shop called early in the morning , and said it was ready. I walked (of course) to the auto body shop and picked it up.

Driving was a bit like meeting someone I haven’t met for a long time. I felt nervous, kind of shy and afraid I might accidentally bump into someone, or get in someone’s way. My clean, undented car was on the road, vulnerable, at the mercy of other drivers and my own stupidity. 

That Wednesday was also the day I got the letter of renewal from my auto insurance company. I can’t express how relieved I was. They hadn’t been going to renew my policy. It wasn’t because of the accident claim, but because of a speeding ticket back in 2022. I emailed an explanation, and begged them to take me back. I also had an agent willing to go to bat for me. They reconsidered and decided just to charge me more. I know all of this makes me out to be a really scary driver, but I’m not. Not yet. 

Work in progress. I’m hoping deer don’t like the taste of coneflowers.

I’m literally digging into my new garden project. It’s the small corner plot I mentioned before that I’m going to decorate with perennials. I like coneflowers. Since they were on sale, I bought a couple plants and put them in the sunniest part of the garden. I found a few others, already in the garden but needing to be moved into the sun. Now they are a group, and if they like each other, I think they will look really pretty, some day. That, and pulling weeds and grass, took up a lot of time on Thursday. 

This morning Gwen and I went to Henks Park for a walk. It has been quite cool all this week. Today, it was still only in the low 60’s, which meant no deer flies following us! It was so great and the woods were beautiful.

We go to Henks Park for the hills and ravines. Some good climbs.
Recently forested, there is a lot of new growth on the paths, and there is also Gwen, on the path.
The woods present some beautiful arrangements. That’s why we go out there.

And right now it is sunny and pouring rain at the same time! Nature does funny stuff, and we just have to go with it. 

Wishing everyone happy weekends!

August 6, 2024 Tuesday Teeth

Tuesday is hiking day for my new bunch of friends, the Birkie Girls. Today’s instructions were to meet in the Walmart parking lot at 9:20 am to car pool to the trailhead some 20 miles away.  I was there early, because Walmart is in my backyard. Of course, I walked – still no car.  When no one showed up I started wondering if I had the wrong day, or the wrong time, but no. The email was clear. Apparently no one needed to car pool, and I hadn’t communicated that I needed a ride this time. So, no hike for me. Not to worry though. It’s evening now and I’ve gotten my 10,000 steps in doing gardening, and walking to the dentist.

This was the long awaited day to get the veneers on my top middle teeth. I have nothing good to say about the temporary set that I’ve had for two weeks. It was like my childhood nightmare of my teeth being loose and falling out come true. They were plastic and not very toothlike, hard to clean, and had to be re-glued once. The second time they fell out was yesterday so I put them back in and didn’t chew anything until my appointment this afternoon. The permanent ones are on now, and what a process. It must be very good glue that they use because it took a good hour to clean the residue out, and now my gums are sore. But they will heal.  My teeth look and feel normal again and I am glad to be done with it. I have spent way too much time in the dentist chair in the last month or so.

Now if I could just refurbish the rest of me…

I feel like teeth are important or I wouldn’t have gone through all this repair and refurbishment. I’ve seen too many unhealthy mouths, especially on the elderly, and I just don’t want those problems as I continue to age. 

I’m struggling with a gardening issue. I want to have a better perennial garden in the corner of the yard, but the deer keep eating the lillies. There’s a lot of Sweet William and Oregano there already but grass and weeds are prominent. A lot of the weeds are invasive species and have to go. Invasive weeds are a metaphor for a lot of what goes on in life…

I am serious about fixing these problems because I want it to be a memorial garden. It’s a garden that Mom started and has always loved and I want to keep it going for her. I also want to put the husband’s ashes somewhere in that space.

The corner garden. This will be my “before” picture.

On the other side of the fence from this corner garden is Walmart. And that will be a story for tomorrow. What on earth are they doing over there?

Small, Useful Fire: #3

A series of memories around a fascinating subject – fire

Two days of hiking in the rain, with temps in the 30’s, just above freezing. We had spent the previous night in a small shelter with 20 other hikers and about that many mice, so there hadn’t been much actual sleep. We were tired, and tired of being cold.

We crawled into camp in the last few minutes of daylight. Tents were going up. I could hear people thinking how nice it would be to sit around a nice, blazing campfire for a while. Some kind trail angel had left large pieces of dry wood in the shelter and it had been arranged in the fire pit, There were obvious signs of attempts to get it burning, but there had been no success. Now it was getting damp.

You can’t hold a match to a large piece of wood and set it on fire. It’s too big of a jump. You must start small, with kindling, and add progressively larger pieces of fuel until the heat load is enough to start the burn in the large piece. It’s a simple principle. But there is a major deficit when any available kindling has been rained on for two days.

I admit to being prideful when it comes to starting fires – one of my many faults. That was part of why I decided I would have a fire that night. The other reason was that I knew people could die of hypothermia and I didn’t want to be one of them. I was hoping this potential blaze would feel my affinity for fire and respond.

Looking in sheltered places, I did locate some less damp sticks and leaves and took my stash to the fire pit. My hope was that a small flame would dry out more of the kindling, if I could keep it alive. It takes getting close and intimate, and it takes patience. I knelt and started tending “the baby”. That’s exactly what it is, a baby fire. It must be given another leaf, another twig, another blast of oxygen, and never allowed to die.

No one wanted to help with this and some probably thought I was crazy to waste time trying to burn wet wood. I was too cold to do anything else. My daughter was setting up our tent, leaving me free to be crazy. I put my face close to the flame and blew gently until I had no more breath, then turned and got a gulp of fresh air, over and over. The dampness was creating a lot of smoke, but that gave me hope that things were drying out a little.

The end of this story is, of course, that the fire progressed as I had hoped. As the larger pieces of dry wood caught and turned into a healthy blaze. It was lovely and it was regarded as near miraculous, which added to my pride, but I knew. It was no miracle but rather persistence, motivated by need. We all enjoyed getting warm again before getting in our sleeping bags for the night.

And my personal attraction to a small, useful fire grew. An intriguing, mysterious gift is what it is… just sayin’.

Another Autumn Walk

I have to say that there are some stunningly beautiful , peaceful, quiet, memorable moments available to us, even in hard times. We must chase them down and live in them whenever possible.

This was actually an accidental take but I find it gets me into the walk quite nicely. Come along…
The place, Duluth MN, the Western Waterfront Trail (or Waabizheshikana if you have trouble pronouncing Western Waterfront) along the St. Louis River. At Indian Point Campground the Parks and Recreation Department is hosting a Glow Hike. The half mile trail is marked with glow sticks. It is dusk and light is fading.
The trail is not crowded, but there is a steady stream of couples, families with children in wagons and strollers, singles like me. People are talking quietly above the sound of feet on the gravel and leaf covered path. There is an almost reverent feel to it all.
It is the perfect time to catch the last light as it turns from warm orange to cool blue. Flocks of ducks fly low and glide into the sheltered marshes along the river. The sense of peace and grace is almost overwhelming.
Even the children, decked in their glowing accessories, find a place to sit and watch.
And we all take pictures because we think we will never again see something so beautiful. We don’t want to forget.
At the campground there are fires to roast marshmallows, cookies and treats for all, quiet conversation, smiles, extra glow sticks.
On the darker side of the peninsula, the lights of Duluth in the distance are almost like glow sticks
The wood around us is darkening, but the silhouettes of leafless branches still catch my eye. The trees are like living beings, exposed against the wide sky for the last few minutes of twilight.
But one last gift comes – a crescent moon among the tops of the pines. Could the world be more wild and beautiful in this place? I have to say that I don’t think it could.

Quietude: A Relationship Baseline

My story is not everyone’s story, of course, but some will identify with it. My relationship with my children has revolved around quiet times more than any other type of activity. I won’t say that we abhorred noise (got some stories to negate that) but our household was quiet, and I think we came to associate that with comfort, safety, calm, peace, refuge and rest.

When they were small, the girls did a lot of quiet playing. We read a lot. During their school years, they studied at home so the house was quiet during school hours. They liked being in their rooms, having friends over to talk or play games. As music got more prominent in their lives, there were occasional loud moments but there didn’t seem to be a time when they were afraid of silence.

Sunset silence, on a walk.

This is a very loud world and I’m kind of glad that we adopted quietude as a way of life, a baseline. I still see Julie and Esther doing their best to plan quietude into their lives. I have many memories of morning coffee time with one or the other of them, in a quiet coffee shop or outside on the patio. We take quiet walks, just us and nature. We sit around campfires with only the sound of the flames and some nightbirds. We sit in the kitchen late at night talking, but not always talking, sometimes just being. We like quiet sports, bike riding, hiking, kayaking and horseback rides. It’s not just okay to be quiet, it’s actually healthy and healing.

Quietude is also about calming and bringing peace, and often when I’m bothered about the twists and turns of life, I call or text my girls. The relationships we’ve built help settle me, make me feel known, heard and somehow calmer. A quiet talk with someone who loves me, listens to my story, maybe even prays with me is the best medicine ever!

Quietude in our relationships tells us it is okay to retreat to a dark room with a headache if we need to. We understand when one of us needs to leave the crowd, or get away from overstimulation. One on one has always been my preferred way of interacting and definitely preferred in my relationship with my daughters. It allows for being quiet, personal, and more deeply relational.

My daughters don’t live near enough to have regular, in person quiet times with me, but my mom and my youngest brother do. Most every morning I take the short walk over to Mom’s front door and open it, knowing the smell of fresh coffee will be there inside. Mom will wave at me from her recliner and we will just sit for a while before we begin to talk. A few minutes later we will hear the door open again and my brother will come in and sit down with us. We talk about what we’re reading, what’s on our mind, how our families are getting along, what our plans are for the day. But often we are quiet, just sitting, thinking. And that’s okay.

Just thinking, in the woods where it’s quiet.

Hike: Relationship Building Activities

This is the end of the first week of A to Z Challenge 2022. I have been completing posts A through H while on a trip and that has made it more of a challenge than other years. I have had to keep it very simple, knowing that it doesn’t compare to some of the other great blogs I’ve been reading. It is still fun to put it together and share. Hope you are enjoying the read.

Having always been a walker, but mostly for the purpose of getting from point A to point Z, hiking was not really a “thing” in life until 2000. That was the year we hosted an exchange student from Sardinia for her last year of high school in the U.S. Having mastered her English enough to graduate, Maura was all set to go to Cancun with a number of classmates to celebrate. I wasn’t very comfortable with that. There were horror stories of young girls disappearing from the beach and never being seen again. I said no.

I had to come up with an alternative activity. I can’t remember why hiking the Appalachian Trail sounded like a reasonable project. Maybe I already had it on my list. At any rate, we put together a small band of adventurers including my daughters and one of their friends, five of us. None with hiking experience.

We survived and we bonded, as often happens with challenging experiences. We got blisters, sore backs, got thirsty, hungry and sleep deprived. Sounds like fun doesn’t it?

While it is comforting to young people to know that their elders are capable and resourceful, it only adds to the depth of a relationship to find out that they are not always that. I think it may have been one of the first times that I was the weak one, needing to be rescued from dehydration and lifted to the next camp via truck. Those girls hiked, by themselves, the twelve miles that day and arrived in camp in record time.

It was a successful hike overall and we had great satisfaction in getting to our car on the fifth day, somewhat more experienced as hikers. Olive Garden fresh salad, bread and Alfredo sauce never tasted as good as it did on that trip home.

Seriously, we were blessed to have made it out alive.

Since that time, hiking has been a passion for me, and it is always better with a daughter or a family member. There are so many good shared moments walking through nature, talking about what we see, making camp, and dividing up chores. We see how we behave when we have less convenience and less distraction. It is getting to know each other in a unique way.

To me, hiking is a special kind of walking, in a particular planned area just for the intent of seeing what’s there and spending time with companions. It can be an hour long, or a week long – distance is not the issue, purpose is. In the last 20 years my girls and I have made lots of memories and seen some amazing places. It has been an important factor in the relationships we have with each other.

Find a friend or family member who you want to get to know better, plan a hike, and get walking!

Springer Mountain. We were there.

Birkie Hike: We Finish!

Just to clarify – I have two Gwens in my life. One is my mother and the other is the friend who has been hiking the Birkie with me. Some who know us have been asking…

November 3, 2021. North End TH to Timber TH, loop. 6.5 miles, 14,828 steps

I asked, “Do you think we really need to go down this hill and touch that road?”

“Yes, of course we do,” Gwen told me. And so we walked down that last hill which marked the completion of our 34 miles of Birkie trail, stuck our poles in the sand, took a picture and started back up the hill. We had walked on the skate side of the Birkie and were looping back to the car on the classic side.

Today was cloudy and cold enough for gloves and hats, but we did end up shedding our outer layer of jackets. At one point near the end, we saw several large white snowflakes falling in the forest so we knew it was in the low 30’s for temperature.

I had spent time studying the map of our remaining section and had printed it out. That meant we only had to question ourselves at a couple intersections where fresh logging roads had added to the confusion.

Rocks and trees are the main features of this forest trail and the subjects of most of my photos. I’ve also started a collection of “meaningful” rocks to mark different hikes I’ve done, so I was on the lookout for a rock. The one that caught my attention was a bit bigger than the pebbles I usually pick up, but it had a pattern to it, and I liked it. Gwen doesn’t stop me from doing stupid stuff, she even carried the rock for me when I needed a rest. We had guesses as to how much it weighed. She won. Thirty-five pounds.

Good job Gwen. This rock will show its pattern more after I wash it up a bit.

Our last stop before leaving Cable, Wisconsin and the Birkie Trail was the Brick House Cafe. It wasn’t that we were hungry, or needed the calories but more that I needed to see if the Chocolate Tower cake was as good as Gwen said it was. I figured we should mark our accomplishment with some kind of splurge, even if we ended up taking it home to put in the freezer (which, by the way, didn’t happen). This cafe is known for its lunches and desserts as attested to by the dozen hunters, and huntresses who trooped in shortly after we were seated.

What I really feel good about, in addition to feeling very exercised, is that I got to be a tourist in my own backyard. I would feel sad not to know what this internationally famous trail was like. Now I know where the trailheads are, how difficult and hilly the terrain can be, and how many more paths are there yet to be explored. I have that sense of ownership that comes with familiarity, and that feels good. The chances of me ever skiing this trail are almost nonexistent, well, they are nonexistent. Really nonexistent. But I have walked it. That’s good enough for me.